Butterfly Effect

flap flap flap...




flap flap flap....





As I turned on the laptop,butterflies were busy flying around in my stomach.This usually happens when I'm waiting for an important email.So as I click on the "MSN Today" to see what mail pops up there..BANG!Butterflies die die die.

As I opened Facebook,and now checking my list of friends,the butterflies start acting up again.WHY?

This are a few moments/times the so called butterfly effect occurs.

1.Almost every time I turn on the computer.
2.When I go somewhere new for the first time.
3.When I recently had to get my teeth extracted..I hate injections.
4.Exams
5.Attending some event/social gathering where I know no one,or maybe I do but the pressure to look my best will bring about the butterflies in me.
6.Going back to Kuantan,especially when I'm going to see my friends.
7.First day of school.Yes even to the school I've been going to for years (this is way back then).The day before school starts will enhance the effect as I would often dream that I end up in school with no books,bag,and my shoes are not clean,and my nails are not cut.
8.Getting on the plane..and worst of all..the LANDING.this is when I'll be munching on sweets so that my ears wont get blocked up like crazy.IT HURTS!
9.Going out on dates..doesn't matter if the guy is my bf or just "I like you,you like me so let's hangout".
10.When nature calls...Big time.(sometimes ok)

So those are just a few examples.
I'm sure there are more times like this but I just can't be arsed to think about it and tell you. :)
I'll spare you for now.


Today is a public holiday which makes no difference to me cos well,it's still the same as any other day since I have no life.
Called Curtin again today because they were suppose to tell me if i'm accepted by TODAY.So when someone tells you "Miss,do call us on monday as we'll have the results by then",you'd call right?So yes,I called and what did they tell me?...

"yes Miss xxxx is not in at the moment but I'll be glad to help you".
So I told this lady my situation and she was like "Oh yes we've sent your application to Bentley for since you did your exams in NZ..they will know what is required.

First of all,their website itself has stated the requirements needed for an undergraduate programme in their uni..which I'm pretty sure I've met.Since their conditions aren't as strict as in NZ.
Secondly,why did they have to wait last minute to send in my application to Bentley?See I sent in my first application sometime in the middle of Jan and then another late two late Jan to this lady whom I called.

Last week she told me she is going to send my application to Bentley then she told my dad that no she's not sending it to Bentley because she will just refer it to someone at their campus here in M'sia.You follow me?
Now today,she told me that she has sent the application to Bentley (what??) and hasn't got a reply from them.I wonder if she just sent it in today or last week itself.She told my dad she sent it in last week la.(Lying or not?).My dad got really pissed off with her after telling him that my brothers application has to be looked at again by some person there as they think my brother's grades were "weak".Why the ""?Well my brother gained 93 credits out of 120 credits that he is able to get from NCEA L1.The passing mark is 80/120.So you tell me how is it that they think my brother didn't do so well?I think he did just fine.Nobody aims to get more than 90 over there as they just need the 80 to get into the next year of high school.Oh and this is after telling my dad last week that they have already accepted my brother into their Uni.wtf.
Bullshit la ok.

So yes,my dad demanded that she do her job properly (well he didn't say that) .What I mean is that he was really angry and showed it.This lady tells us to email her this and that and all we ask is that she replies us with the results.What does she do?Nothing!No reply..so we're the ones who have to call her and ask what's going on..this really made my dad mad.No courtesy to reply someone who's interested in you're Uni?
That lady had the nerve to tell my dad not to pressure her and not to push it.WHAT?
Not to push it?PRESSURE HER?wtf
My dad is the one who has to deal with ppl like her who tells him that his son has been accepted and they are already out to give him the acceptance letter (which of course didn't come) and later tells him that "oh we have to re check again,lalala it's so funny".
Oh not to mention the fact that he has to book accommodation and airplane tickets to get his two kids to the Uni.wtf.

Orientation for new deg students starts on the 16th of this month.So let's say if I'm accepted late and all that then what?Must pay for the late entrance fee?To hell with you la.You gave us so much trouble now want us to pay?wth is this..burning a hole in my dad's wallet.

This University is suppose to be good.I've seen people write about the campus in Australia and I've seen and read about people who have gone to study there like Kenny Sia.It seems like a good University to go to.All I want is to get accepted and to just go through this one year at the Uni with no major problems whatsoever.Can or not?

Not even in Uni but facing all this problems.I really don't understand why I face so many of this kind of set backs in my life.I was told that I would face many problems in my life..I guess that person predicted right..but then again,I'm the master of my own destiny and my own life.I will make this different.It will start with this drama right here.

I'll show you!

Going Places

David left for England and Germany,
Redo will be a California boy in 6mths,
That girl Amanda is back and in love,
Aman is in India with her son (i think),
I might join the Sarawakians once I get accepted into the Uni.

Awhile ago I talked to my aunty and cousin who are in Qtwn.I miss it.My aunt was advising me while my cousin told me the latest gossips at work.I miss work.The credit on our i-Talk ran out while we were busy talking,dang it!
I am still furious at her for not helping,for giving up on me and him,for forgetting,for not wanting to do anything anymore,for wanting me to forget.
I still talk to her but I have that feeling,u know the one u just wish u could see that someone so u can stab them or just give them a nice whacking?Yes that one.

I learnt to laugh,
I learnt to fall again,
I tried my best,I used the time I had,
it wasn't enough.
No I'm not back to crying at night,no!
this is me telling you that I'm disappointed.

I've been back for a mth plus now,this month will mark my second month being home.
January has been crazy.
I had a birthday,my dad turned 50! and I spent a lot of time out of this house for once.
From movies to mamak-ing,to bowling at night to just the usual watching em guys whack some balls on the court.The last week of January was amazing.
Now that everyone is back in school,university and work,I'm stuck at home once again with nothing to do but worry if those people are ever going to accept me into their Uni.*prays*

What do u think February will bring u?
My cousin is getting married this week!
and by the end of this year,I'll be an aunty :D
anak Sharon Paul dan Rusdi Ramli..cute.

To my friends,have fun in whatever you're doing yah.
Ash I can't wait for u to get back here again..Oh u know he sent me a msg telling me to look up these two words his friend taught him.*shakes head* Naughty naughty!
Alana did he tell you?Want me to fill u in? :D

I miss you guys.

I want to kick some balls!
I'm angry inside.My dad knows how angry I am.
I can't see him or talk to him..probably for the rest of my life.
How would that make you feel?

Malaysian weather is crazy!
When I got back I had no more zits..now if u see me.haih.
My zits know how to place themselves well . :(
I'm ugly now..I have zits that won't go away.
i hate the weather!

gimme ice gimme snow gimme gimme clear skin.

This post is meaningless.It has no sense of direction.
pfftt,going places konon. :/

Twilight update

Just read Ashraf's message and he said that..

TWILIGHT is coming out on the 29th of this month in Malaysia. :(

HOW???wait for me la Ash..u promised to watch with me..but noooo he's going with Zureen pulak.ish ish.

Jealous I tau...not cos ur going with her but cos ur watching before me and not with me!

U promised!

Haih..I'll be the outdated one.sad case lynn.

I'm bloody pissed off.

Talking to my dad on MSN now and telling him about the whole incident between my mom and I.Damn irritating I tell u when I have to recall it and explain myself.It's a whole lot of misunderstanding that involves me not cursing and swearing but my mom claims I did curse and swear when it was our daily "prayer time".
I won't go into details as I'm sure no one will want to know and I will get even more pissed off my head will explode anytime.
ISH!
This whole thing was like 3 weeks or so ago..3 bloody weeks!She did say a thing or two to me but in a cold manner.Big shock?NO.Typical la.

My dad is on my side though.He thinks that's just how my mom is.I feel bad for talking about my mom like that.Ever since I came here we've gotten much closer..shopping and all together.So now I can't go shopping.I don't have my shopping buddy anymore... and I just can't talk to her. :(
I use to hate people ranting in their blogs when it's their sappy time but look at me now.I don't care though.

I have a long list(non existent list) of things to buy here before I go home.The clothes here are so cheap u'll go gaga over the prices I tell u.A really nice top can be bought for $19.90.*sigh*.I'll miss the things here..and the scenery.As the day passes by,I feel kinda bumped out bout going back cos I won't be able to see the people I've come to call my friends.
Some will go back to Brazil,England,Germany,Argentina,India,and Netherlands..so far away.I'll miss them all and kinda hope they don't forget me.I have thing this where I think I'm so easily forgotten for some reason.It's weird and stupid I have to say.

OHOH
Spring/summer dresses are as low as $39.90.*cries*
I want not one not two...but as many as I can get.
Ohoh..
Dad said not to change my NZD for RMs as the change rate is lower now.WHY MALAYSIA?U're suppose to welcome me with open arms not with low current exchange rates!wtf.

Dear friends..
I promised some of u bday presents and I shall bring them home in a huge luggage bag (mostly my things in it la ) :P
jkjk..but yes I'll do my best to get u guys things.I am not an ungrateful person.
Hare,how to get u stuff?Everything I get u,u can buy even more..but I still will get u something even if is is a New Zealand made.........:D

Now I'm in a much better mood.*exhales*.
I better go now.Still talking to my dad on MSN..talking about shopping weih.Not bad la my dad.
He said I'm the only one who will not say "I love u" when he says it.It's true?I think la.I'm not sure why.It's just not normal.We don't practice saying 'I LOVE YOU S' in our house/family so it's weird.
It's the distance that's why..ish.Distance will make things weird.Don't do it.hahaha.

Irritation

Irritation!

1.First of all i'm so effin irritated that I cant blog as much as I want.
2.Mom has been making noise cos my sibs and I r constantly with the lappy..what else to do la mum.
3.I've got internals coming soon plus a MOCK exam in Sept.:(
4.The weather is so bad..freakin windy that I think I could even fly here..freakin strong I tell u.
5.That effin lady at work is seriously gettin on my nerve n I duno how long I can take it in n not yelling at her..all I have to say is she doesnt know me well..my temper.

Now out of irritation...some good things hv been happenin aswell.This week alone I've made 3 new friends.All three are Germans and are really nice. :D
First is Jana whose name is pronounced Yana..then theres Moritz and Henry.I'm so glad to have them as friends.Jana and I are off to watch Batman on tues..so I'm thinkin of askin the two guys to tag along (that's if I'm even better friends with them).They kinda remind me off Brice and Matheus and I miss those two dudes a whole lot. :(

Jana has been a really great friend..we're not THAT close but we're gettin there.She even came home with me during lunch time n I served her hot Milo..n she loved it.Ben said the way she drank it was so damn wrong..she was enjoyin it to the max la with all the sound effect she was giving.
U know when u drink milo then at the end there'll b the blackie stuff right..when theres not much liquid left so yeah..she drank that aswell..I dont like that bit.

So cant wait to watch Batman.Frm so many ppls blog I've read bout hw good it was n how Heath Ledger did an amazing job *R.I.P*.Cant wait!!!

I'm not sure when I'll get to blog again though..so I'm making the use of this moment..which I'm typing for my life now cos my mom is on her way home n I dont want her to catch me with this laptop..is like I'm havin an affair with this thing.*sigh*

Tmr is Friday n also the 1st of August..Finally!No more July..my gosh.Counting down the day till its finally time to say goodbye to this freakish country!wooHoooo!
Malaysia..I cant believe i'm saying this but I freakin miss u. :)

I wanted to say something bout something but now I cant rmb what that something is.Dammit!Oh to those who do come in n read my posts..pls do me a favour and leave a comment or a hi or wtv on my box.Thanks heeps..haha :)

Ohyeah now I rmb what it was I wanted to say..
MTV ASIA AWARDS!!!!!!
How can I not be there???I so cant go..this is a huge irritation dissapointing n haih..
JARED LETO weih.. :(
My one chance to see that hottie n i'm not tere ?????I'm so far away..geez.

I WANA GO TO THE MTV ASIA AWARDS PEOPLE!!

crying off...(gt such thing ?)
-lynn-

Pissed!

..I'm effin PISSED OFF!

Whn someone asks u something which is really perverted over and over and over again..wont u get annoyed..especially if tht someone is someone u dont even noe? I guess its part my fault for letting him add me on MSN.
But..he was asking for it all the time..Jst to shut him up I gave. *sigh*
So here's what happened.

Went on9..he came saying hi n calling me dear. *pukes*
Then he asked me.."hey,have u seen a guy's cock b4?".Let me tell u..this isnt the 1st time he's asked.

DAMN U!

wad the hell is wrong wit u?Cant u tell I DONT like talkin to u bout all that? I dun even noe this dude n he comes asking me all sorts.
Everytime..EVERYTIME he comes to talk to me..its always about making out or sex.
Not askin me to do with him la..Kick his balls if he asks.
Come to think of it..I feel like doing that now=Kicking him..fucked up!
Was talking to Abhi bout this.She said to go tell him to grow some balls..hahaha. :P
I seriuosly dont like that guy.So I've already told him off...B4 tellin him off he said why cant i answer his question n not to b too stuck up n sensitive.

STUCK UP?SENSITIVE??

I'll show u.
I said i'm not n he said..."a lil".
So I got mad..said U shud noe ur acting like a big ass perv n if u wana whank or wadever i dont give a shit. He said o-k..n tht was it!
HAH!

......

Feel like a bitch now.

I shouldnt feel guitly now should I? Nah..I do feel a lil bit bad for saying things to him n about him but HEY..he asked for it right. Sooner or later it was bound to happen.
Thousands of times I've told him I wont talk to him about these kinda stuff as I duno him.He didnt wana listen.

Ass..
So not in the mood now..
Talking to my dad on9 now.Telling me bout this guy..a guy I know.N he's commenting.
Pa,I dont bother what ppl might think of him...he has a good heart n he's a nice guy.
:)
So ok..enough getting mad n all.
Here's what I wanted to write about today before that all happened..Man this blog is a long 1. :P

Heath Ledger..
Now we all know he passed away..poor guy.
I was watching "10 Things I Hate About U"..Watched it many times b4 but I duno how I didnt realise this..he has a SEXY smile..haha :)

Really!!
He smiles alot in that movie..well..kinda. N its a really nice smile.Nice bod too..ehehehe :P
This is him..incase u duno or forgotten :) N yes he aint smillin here but alah..jst take my word for it k? In tht movie he did smile..aww so sweet.

I guess that's all for now.

R.I.P Heath Ledger!Though I've nvr liked u or thought ur hot..still..u had a really nice smile. :D

Movie,stomach n that thing

Second post..man I'm a loner. :P

It's Friday already.(yesss!!!)Goodbye Feb n com'on in March.

Currently hungry but preventing myself from eating..have been putting on weight which isn't good for me cos well it shows on my face not the bodaaay.
What's the news today?
Firstly I did NOT go to school yet again.I didn't exactly lie..no one asked so I didn't bother saying anything.
Mom doesn't know..doesn't matter anyway.Its not like anyone will notice I'm not there.I wish!

Been lazying around the whole day and trying to figure out this blog spot thingy.I'm managing OK..first time.Gotta give me credit for trying. :)

Friday is a movie night for us here.
Last week we rented "Lucky U","Music & Lyrics",and "Just Like Heaven".
Lucky U was ok..Music n Lyrics..well..it was hurm..thts all i gotta say.I've watched Just Like Heaven b4..and I love it.

So for today we rented Rush Hour 3,Sister Act 2 and Shawshank Redemption.Ohyea..if u guys haven't watched Shawshank Redemption..then go rent it.Its awesome..smart movie.
We(year 13 students) are watching that movie for English.
It was turned down whn it came out..n then someone else picked it up n gave it rave reviews n wallah its a hit now.
Its New Zealand's #1 movie in the top 100.
I'm not making things up...I saw on a poster at the video store.

Today has been quiet except for my terrible laughing out loud watching Rush Hour 3.Ben (my lil bro) isn't around cos of basketball games.So its us gals at home.
My mom n sis have been singing "Ain't no mountain high enough" the song on Sister Act..Gosh they destroyed the song.
Mom la..hahaha. :)

...stomach making noise now!!
Need food!!!

My post today isn't gona b interesting..more on my stomach n movies.
Sry..but it is MY blog n i'm entitled to write wad I want to right?

Oh I'm on msn now..
this guy I'm talkin to now is like freakin blahhhh..horny like mad.
Always ask me questions..if u noe wad I mean.
I did try to insult him (if u can call it that la) to get him away..but NOOOOO he comes back for more.
What's his problem..oh he knows I'm older than he is but he still talks to me as though I mite b interested.. -_-~!
He has one thing on his mine all the time... SEX!
N probably wanking (thx des for teachin me a new word)..aduiz..kesian btul this budak.
I'm so sorry for talking bout u here if u read this..but u seriously need to quit it.
Its no fun talkin to u like that..all u wana talk bout is that..n I'm not interested.
N u asking me if I'm sure I'm not interested in having sex when I'm here is none of ur business plus cant u jst accept my answer?????

Whts lemon breast wife??
U have a wife with breast like lemon?hahahaha :P
I asked him wad he meant..n its exactly what i said..hahahahahaha.

I'm really really sorry for this boy.
I haven't told anyone bout u..i think..so I'm just dishing it out here.

Ok I shall stop..I feel bad d.

I'm effin hungry..! :(
I want mamak!!!!I miss Malaysian food.

Anyways..I guess I better stop typing.
Duno wad to write..
Till next time then.